January 5 (361) Sit Here

“Here’s the deal. You are going to sit here until you forgive yourself.”

That’s what Richard, the brazen Texan, says to the spiritually struggling Liz during her stay at an Ashram in India. If you saw the movie, Eat, Pray, Love then this message is already buried somewhere in your subconscious. So I just brought it back to the surface. You’re welcome.

We choose whether to carry our past forward into our future. 

Every uncovered mistake I have ever made presented me with nearly immediate consequences. Because of the heaven or hell dichotomy of my religious training, it took me decades to realize that natural consequences are all the punishment I’ll ever receive for each mistake I make. There is no other punishment waiting for me at the end of life. 

If the fear of punishment is lifted we now can choose how to spend our adult lives. I'm only in my fifties, so there's still time for me to learn otherwise, but I strongly suspect that the primary work of adulthood is to consciously interrupt the cycle of self punishment that we came to accept as normal and replace it with the habit of self-forgiving.

Now, forgiveness is not an eraser. It is not amnesia. It is more like a brand new set of coloring pencils. You get to imagine and create the best possible circumstances you can dream up. And if you can’t imagine any improvement right now, and you are ready, trust that a teacher will appear to show what is possible, even for a beginner. 

There is a way of thinking about time that understands the past is gone and that the future is not yet. All you really have is right now. This very moment. So, sit here until you forgive yourself. 

Then, live.